Were The World Mine: The Bard and the Bois

Were the World Mine combines Shakespeare, homoeroticism, Baz Lurhmann-styled musical numbers and a coming out in a vaguely derivative way, but it is charming all the same. The movie works more on a fantastic, fairy tale level than as the out and out allegory it strives for.

At an all-boys high school in a conservative small town witchy free spirit English teacher Ms. Tebbit (Wendy Robie) follows the time honored tradition of mounting a production of a Shakespeare play with an all male cast.

The play is A Midsummer’s Night Dream, and Tebbit has her eye on the new kid, Timothy (Tanner Cohen) to play the role of Puck. Timothy has just moved to the town with his mother, following a messy divorce. The rugby team picks him on because they (rightfully) assume that’s he’s gay. The play gives him an opportunity to display is lovely American Idol-styled tenor. Timothy struggles at home with a mother who is ambivalent about his sexuality, and has a crush on the dashing lead rugby player Jonathon (Nathaniel David Becker). Ms. Tebbit casts the play with the reluctant seniors. When he is learning his lines, Timothy finds a secret spell encoded in the language of the play. The typographic ‘reveal’ of the spell is a visually arresting moment. Timothy ends up with an enchanted iris that expels a potion that awakes instant desire in all who sprayed by it. Timothy uses the flower to both attain his heart’s desire and teach his town a lesson. There are, of course, hijinks along the way.

The narrative and its subplots are interrupted by flights of fancy, in the form of goofy, tongue-in-cheek musical interludes, with keening, Broadway style voices and bevies of shirtless dancing boys. The set of the play spills over into real life, with gorgeous images of half nude males, with glitter on their faces, cavorting in fields of night blooming flowers. It’s High School Musical with the Abercrombie and Fitch models as directed by Pierre et Gilles. Such eye candy! At the same time, the prettiness and youth-obsession that permeates the film can be a little much. The machinations of the plot, with its cartoon-like villains, borders on the hackneyed. It’s a treacly treat, a gay version of those Rankin and Bass Christmas specials, complete with a moral lesson.

Ms. Tebbit is easily the most intriguing character of the movie. She alone seems immune to the spell of homosexuality that pervades the town. Robie, with her dramatic, Grande Dame face and mane of fiery red hair, invests the role with a mystical gravitas. When she is on screen, you can’t look away. The actor even throws in a little mordant camp for good measure. In sum, Were The World Mine will satisfy your sweet tooth. It’s a fluffy, fun fable.