W.W.S.D. - Can't Get You Out Of My Head

"What Would Summer Do?" is the TNG advice column. Contact Summer Camp with your questions at wwsd@thenewgay.net.

Dear Summer,

Last weekend, I went to an 80’s party. They played some really great music that took me back to my new wave days, but they also played some terrible songs that I cannot get out of my head. The worst offender is Sheena Easton’s, “Sugar Walls.” I’m not kidding, from the moment I wake up in the morning until I close my eyes at night, I find myself humming that god-awful melody. At work, I’ve caught myself singing it under my breath during meetings. I don’t think it’s appropriate for me to be singing these lyrics in front of my boss: “Blood races to your private spots, let’s me know there’s a fire!” I cannot get it out of my head! What Would Summer Do?

Stuck on Repeat


Dear Stuck,

OMG! You must be really old. I’ve never even heard of that song.

Okay, I’m lying. I know that song, and to be honest, I LOVE IT! I draw inspiration from it. The only person I know who hated that song as much as you do is Tipper Gore, one of the Washington Wives who co-founded the ridiculous Parents Music Resource Center (PMRC).

Sugar Walls, composed by Prince, cracked the top ten pop charts back in 1984, had a fierce video featuring Miss Easton in a neon yellow blouse with matching earrings, and even made the PMRC Filthy Fifteen. I wish I could put that on my resume.

For the readers who weren’t even born in 1984, check out the following video, courtesy of Back Porch Videos (btw, this is one of my favorite YouTube channels):



So, wasn’t that just delicious? Do you feel like you need to brush your teeth? Eat your heart out Madonna...with your derivative hard candy. Sheena was the original Sticky and Sweet chanteuse. (An extra ten points to the first person who correctly identifies the artist and name of the song that began to play at the end of the video. Another oldie, but goodie).

So, What Would Summer Do if she had Sugar Walls playing in her head all day? Nothing! With the economy in the crapper, the possibility that the Mummy and the Mommy running the U.S., and a nasty herpes outbreak, I’ll take Sheena’s sugary walls any day. Like Sheena sang, “Come spend the night inside my Sugar Walls.”