TNG Flashback: Out At Work
Or,Dear New Straight Female Colleague: Please Stop Flirting With Me. Love, Michael
The work day is almost over. We hope you use your last ounce of concentration to revisit this year-old TNG article. Originally published by Michael on 3/20/2008
I'm out at work. I included some of my queer community building projects and queer-related volunteering gigs to my resume, so I obviously put it out there from the get go. But office dynamics change. New people come all the time, replacing previous colleagues. The workplace is hardly static. So, aside from wearing a pink triangle on my coat lapel or hanging a rainbow flag in my office, how can I prevent the constant need to "come out" to new colleagues as they flux into my life.
Particularly annoying is when new colleagues decide that you are going to be their workplace crush. They stop by your office and strike up senseless conversations when you're in the middle of some important work or Scrabulous game. They perk up when they see you in the hallways. They try to sit near you in the lunch room.
I'm currently experiencing a very mild version of the above. I feel bad about the attention I'm getting. Partially because it's not going to go anywhere, and partially because it makes me feel really uncomfortable.
At the same time, perhaps the straight-to-gay crush (not to be confused with the gay-to-straight crush discussed earlier) can easily segue into a friendship. My friendship with a woman in grad school started off as her crushing on me. Once we got over that awkwardness, we ended up having a lot of fun together. She was probably the closest thing I've ever had to a "fag hag". I even fake-proposed to her to be my fake-wife once, getting down on bended knee and slipping a vending-machine ring on her pinky. So maybe I should be so stand-offish towards her?
But I digress.
I'm considering getting a picture of me and my boyfriend framed and putting it on my desk. Or perhaps I can start dropping hints. I don't know. I'm at a loss. Any ideas?
I'm out at work. I included some of my queer community building projects and queer-related volunteering gigs to my resume, so I obviously put it out there from the get go. But office dynamics change. New people come all the time, replacing previous colleagues. The workplace is hardly static. So, aside from wearing a pink triangle on my coat lapel or hanging a rainbow flag in my office, how can I prevent the constant need to "come out" to new colleagues as they flux into my life.Particularly annoying is when new colleagues decide that you are going to be their workplace crush. They stop by your office and strike up senseless conversations when you're in the middle of some important work or Scrabulous game. They perk up when they see you in the hallways. They try to sit near you in the lunch room.
I'm currently experiencing a very mild version of the above. I feel bad about the attention I'm getting. Partially because it's not going to go anywhere, and partially because it makes me feel really uncomfortable.
At the same time, perhaps the straight-to-gay crush (not to be confused with the gay-to-straight crush discussed earlier) can easily segue into a friendship. My friendship with a woman in grad school started off as her crushing on me. Once we got over that awkwardness, we ended up having a lot of fun together. She was probably the closest thing I've ever had to a "fag hag". I even fake-proposed to her to be my fake-wife once, getting down on bended knee and slipping a vending-machine ring on her pinky. So maybe I should be so stand-offish towards her?
But I digress.
I'm considering getting a picture of me and my boyfriend framed and putting it on my desk. Or perhaps I can start dropping hints. I don't know. I'm at a loss. Any ideas?
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