Gays, Sex, and the Lutheran Church

TNG Managing Editor and religious conflict studier Corey submitted this piece.

I've lately been forced to spend a little less time writing for TNG and a little more time writing my thesis, for which the March deadline has been too rapidly approaching. My topic is the consideration within the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America of altering their position on sexuality - specifically, on how to handle same-sex partnered members of the congregation and, potentially, of the clergy.

The word "Evangelical" seems out of place in their name, at least in our current sociopolitical climate, as they are not what one would typically call an evangelical church. The ELCA is part of mainline protestantism - like the Episcopal and Methodist churches - and has almost five million members. Like these other mainline groups, it has traditionally been more liberal than other Christian denominations, including other protestants and Catholics. The final draft of their proposed "statement on human sexuality" won't be publicly released until February 19th; my thesis adviser is actually on the task force making the decision, but is sworn to secrecy until that date. (For anyone who has felt like a professor was keeping critical information just beyond your reach - I think I have you beat.)

I've been thinking about this a lot, though, and have read through dozens of church documents and studies, as well as a draft of their final proposal. My most shocking discovery is that the Lutheran church has done what many Americans have failed to do: they've separated gays from sex.

When I started coming out to people a few years ago, I often felt disenfranchised from gay people I talked to who invalidated some of my opinions on the basis that I hadn't had sex. I told one friend that I didn't think about myself as a top or a bottom, and he just laughed and said, "Don't worry, that'll change once you've actually done something." Indeed, a lot of people thought it was weird for me to come out when I hadn't so much as kissed a guy before. "How do you know you're gay?" they asked. It's a silly question - plenty of people think they're hetero before they've hooked up with members of the opposite sex, and most of them don't wonder if they should make out with some individuals of their sex or gender "just to check." The presumption is that people are hetero until proven gay, and Exhibit A in the U.S. Orientational Court tends to be sex.

What interests me about the Lutheran's process is that they have separated sex and orientation. In 2005, the church as a whole decided against the task force's recommendation to allow people in same-sex relationships to serve as pastors. When this happened, newspapers across the country published headlines like, "Lutheran Church Continues Ban on Homosexual Pastors." As I have written my thesis, my adviser has asked me to never use the term homosexual or gay. The ELCA has never in its history so much as hinted at a ban on homosexual persons from serving as pastors. The question is: do people with homosexual orientations have to remain celibate to serve, or can those in committed same-sex relationships also be rostered members?

On the one hand, this is not a great thing. It sets a double standard between gay candidates and hetero ones (as hetero pastors can be married in the ELCA), and suggests that there is something wrong with gays having sex.

On the other hand, it also shows that Lutherans accept that some people are gay and that there is nothing about this itself that prevents them from serving. A gay individual is not just a disease-infested whore, but rather an individual with a different sexual orientation than her/his hetero peers.

It should also be noted that the churches are expected to be warm and welcoming to any gay members of their congregations. What the church is trying to decide is not whether or not to welcome gay persons, partnered or single, but rather how to address those partnerships - whether or not to bless those relationships. It remains to be seen exactly how they will decide, but when the task force publishes their recommendations next week, we'll know at least what is to be voted on this summer.

The whole thing is a bit confusing to me, considering the following. The church acknowledges that sex is a good thing, part of God's creation and not something about which to be ashamed. They believe that it has more than just a procreative function. However, they also believe that it is strictly for people in committed, life long relationships, and as of today, they seem on the fence as to whether or not it is something that gay people should be doing.

I guess I have a hard time wrapping my head around ambivalence towards sex. I can better understand the wackos who think it's all filthy and awful - I disagree, but at least that makes sense. And I can understand people, religious or otherwise, who think sex is enjoyable and an essential part of life, and believe that as long as it's safe, they will go for it as they see fit. The ELCA's position is much more nuanced, and hard for this agnostic gay man to figure out.

But for better or for worse, I know that they have drawn a distinction between gay people and gay sex - and even gay sex and gay relationships. While they may choose to largely affirm gay relationships, they still won't approve of a weekend of cruising Craigslist and going to glory hole parties (sorry, y'all). And in a world that too often equates gay identity with who and when and where we fuck, I think that on at least some level this is a good thing.