Hypothetical: Drop the Bomb

Last year, I wrote about the widely publicized "Gay Bomb"-- the US Defense Department funded program to develop a weapon that, when dropped on enemies of the state, turns them into homosexuals. I wish I was making this up.

Recently, I was in the shower talking with my boyfriend about turning super-villain in order to give the gay agenda some teeth. In doing so I realized I would need to get my hands on one of these gay bombs if I had any chance of adding bite to an agenda whose bark is limited to creating costumery and wallpapering its secret underground compound.

If the religious right continues to depict the gay community as an organized body similar to SPECTRE or some other shadow organization, can't we at least meet them half way? Like most bond villains, we occasionally provide good oratory and appear to run a tight operation with lots of razzle dazzle, but we don't have much to show for it. I say, forget the speech, Goldfinger. It's time to drop the bomb.

Thinking through hypothetical situations is a hobby of mine, but I need your help on this one. Say we have only one gay bomb (with a blast radius of DC Metro) that permanently turns everyone of legal age into a force-five faggot. In an effort to make a statement that solidifies the diabolical reputation of said agenda and enact real progress, we need to decide our target carefully.

If you have a city in mind, post it in the comment section, along with your rationale for propagating homosexuals from the ranks of its citizens by unleashing the full fury of man lust on its streets. Consider this question carefully, because if TNG gets its hands on one, we aren’t going to f*** around.