In Defense of Skinny Boys
After a long night of partying on Saturday, I stopped off at El Tamarindo on 18th and U to get some papoosas. A combination of the current night's drinking and the morning's lingering hangover left me unable to finish more than one, but one of my dining companions was making a concentrated effort to put down his third. 6'3'' and rail thin, he explained to the table that he wanted to prove that he was naturally skinny, not one of those homos that never eats. I knew exactly what he meant.
I too have the dubious distinction of being built like a female supermodel and you would not believe some of the shit that people say to me. Strangers ask me if I'm properly fed and 90-pound girls put their hands around my waist and exclaim "Zachary, you're skinnier than I am."
It's got to stop.
No one really likes their own body. While people may attain a certain level of pride or confidence at their physical shape, you'd be hard pressed to find someone out there that couldn't think of of a dozen things they would change about themselves. As such, most people are really careful when talking about someone else's figure. While I doubt you would approach an overweight acquaintance and say "You are the fattest person here! How did you get so fat?" people have very few compunctions about making very loud and very public statements about my lack of physical substance.
Someone at Miss Adams Morgan said "Oh, honey, you must be cold" when she saw me walk by. People regularly express surprise when they see me eat. Gay culture puts a lot of emphasis on both muscularity and skinniness, and as such everyone gets fucked. If you're too bulky you get mocked as a muscle queen and if you're not bulky enough people practically expect you to puke between meals. Everyone that falls in between might be very critical of themselves, but probably do not have to deal with a backlash for something they have no control over.
I hope this isn't making you shake your head and mutter "Boo hoo, bitch." Its just that I've heard way more gay guys complain about being too scrawny than being too fat. I think we get more shit. It makes me wonder if there is still a "gay body type." Everyone seems to have an idea of what gay culture pushes them to look like, but at the same time not a single person would proudly stand up and say they have attained it.
The "gay body" has changed so much. First we were supposed to look like Tom of Finland sketches. But that was attainable, so Calvin Klein made the whole free world want to to fuck junkies. A separate offshoot worships the big and hairy. The metrosexual look has us all trim and fit, but of course not overly built. What now? When can we finally just start looking like ourselves?
6 comments:
pupusa. pupusa. pupusa.
To hell with body image issues; let's hear more about these pupusas.
Perhaps Zack was eating female versions of the devices Native Americans use to carry their babies?
"El T" has some pretty good papusas, actually, but sometimes they slip some pork into the bean and cheese ones: a sad discovery for those who don't eat pork, or meat for that matter.
I feel your pain! For years, people (even my own mother) would make statements to the effect that I looked like a concentration camp survivor, yet try as I might I could never gain weight. It is not appropriate to comment on others' physical appearance, sometimes even when you think you're saying something nice.
Ah, Zach, I feel your pain. For me it's especially bad when I go home and people see me again after months of being away - "Are you eating enough?" "Looks like you've lost weight!" I just want to scream "Dude, I LOVE food and I drink enough carbs and sugars to skip to liquids alone!"
I think the interesting thing is that, for many, the skinny/fat thing has to do with the waistline. But if you're like me at all, I hear "skinny" and I think of my chicken legs, my small arms, my lack of any sort of butt. I'll be the first to fess up about insecurities involving my body, but for me, skinny = lanky = gangly. And I'm well aware and don't need anyone calling me out on it.
Still, when someone does mention it, I try to take it as the compliment they usually are trying to make. And I desperately cling to that one description that was, at one time, accurate for me..."swimmer's build, swimmer's build, swimmer's build..."
Yes, THANK YOU! I feel your pain...
Post a Comment